Logo, Spiritual Business Coach, EAM® Mentor, Maria Saraphina

How to know if you’re operating out of love or fear.

A simple way of knowing whether you’re operating out of fear or love is to notice the level of speed, need and necessity involved.

The more you need something in order to do or be anything, and the more it needs to happen right this very moment and the more it HAS to happen because you will not be able to continue otherwise, the more fear is driving.

Simply put:

Fear is fast and frantic.
Love is slow and deliberate.

When in a car, who’d you prefer the driver to be?

The one who will take the curves and hills in high speed on screeching wheels barely staying on the road, or the one who will navigate those same challenges with wisdom and knowledge?

You will still be taking the road, but the way you choose to go it will determine your experience.

Know this; everyone experiences fear. That is a given. What you choose to do about though, is your responsibility.

“All healing is essentially the release from fear.”
– A Course in Miracles

Mastery through love

The experience of fear is not necessarily an indicator that shouldn’t do or be what you fear, in fact it is very likely that everything you desire is on the other side of it. You do, however have a choice in how you approach it. Because all fear is essentially an opportunity for growth and healing.

An opportunity for you to bring light into dark corners of your mind, allowing them to surface and heal them.

That is done through love.

I’m no proponent for pushing yourself across fear kicking and screaming, because it uses the mechanisms of ego and fear and serves nothing but to fuel and prolong it. Instead I invite you to heal your fears consciously in love, with love and for love.

If you don’t you will only experience a brief moment of elation before embarking on your next search, rather than the deep seated peace and eternal satisfaction that comes from feeling the oneness within.

Your heart may be racing, your hands may be sweaty, your breathing may be erratic, your throat may feel restricted and your mind may be erupting, but do it anyway.

Breathe deeply.
Become one with your pulse pulsating throughout your entire being.
Still your mind.
– then jump.

Do it everyday for as long as it takes until you are comfortable doing it, whatever it is. Until love has found its way into every corner of it leaving no space for fear and move on.

“…any attempt to resolve the error through attempting the mastery of fear is useless. In fact, it asserts the power of fear by the very assumption that it need be mastered. The true resolution rests entirely on mastery through love.”
– A Course in Miracles


I have come to a point where I will not do anything if not done in love, by love and for love, and what I have found has been absolutely astonishing.

Where before I would constantly worry about getting things done, doing them right, and at the right time, releasing all of that to love, to God has shown me how easy things can be when I let go.
Let go of the outcome and result.
Let go of the way and the how.
Let go of the time and the space.

I still experience resistance and fear.
I still experience worry and concern.
I still experience obstacles and challenges.

I do however, approach them with love.

Rather than push myself, I allow for relaxation.
Rather than suppress negative self-talk I listen fully, recognise the insanity and apply love and kindness.
Rather than lash out I heal my projections.

I choose love

I am not done, and may not be in this lifetime, but my choice for love is unwavering and as I write this I have tears of gratitude in my eyes remembering that scared young woman, who lying on her knees in her bathroom, begged to be taken out of her misery and who for a split second experienced instant recognition and knowledge that only love is real and thus began her walk home.

I am Home.
In Love.
In God.
I am Home.

Be vigilant

For a while I allowed ego to translate my choice for love into passivity. I thought I was choosing love until I realised that somehow certain conditions unconsciously had found their way into it and were holding me back, containing me, rather than serving as the expansion of love.

“To create is to love. Love extends outward simply because it cannot be contained.”
– A Course in Miracles

The words of “I will only do it in love, for love and by love” became an excuse for not doing the work, for not healing my fears, for not serving the whole. An excuse for hiding and not speaking up.

“The ego always speaks first. It is capricious and does not mean its maker well.”
– A Course in Miracles


I will leave you with an invitation as I am sure reading these words have brought up thoughts and feelings in you.
I invite you to grab a piece of paper (or sign up below to download the worksheet I have created for you) and scribble out whatever has come up.

Allow everything to flow onto the page(s). In doing so you open up the opportunity for healing and growth within you.

Once done, make a list of 10 (or more) things that scares the living shit out of you. Your deepest desires. When you have the list, pick one and with love begin your journey of healing whatever fear may be blocking it. Work on it consciously for the next 30 days and prepare to be astounded by miracles.

Share it

Ego and fear thrives in shadows so I invite you to bring your desires to light! Share one with us below or talk to a friend who knows how to simply listen and hold space, so that you may be supported in healing from within.

As you acknowledge your desires, face your fears and move through them you are not only healing yourself, but the world.

“This world will change through you.”
– A Course in Miracles

As you allow for more and more light to pour forth from you and through you, you become a stronger and stronger container. Able to carry more loads, able to light up more of the world, able to spread love out into the universe further and wider than you’ll ever be able to experience with your human senses.

You are beautiful.

In the comments below, tell me:

What’s one deep desire scaring the bejesus out of you?

I love you. Take care.

xo, Maria Saraphina

Spiritual Business Coach & Energy Alignment Method® Mentor

The 5 Steps


With The Energy Alignment Method®


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