Doing It Anyway – When Fear Trips You Up
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Doing It Anyway – When Fear Trips You Up – Transcript
Hello, Radiant One and a very big and very warm welcome in to today’s episode in which we’re going to be talking about something that I haven’t quite defined. I don’t have a fancy word for it. I’m sure that someone else will have that.
But it’s about not postponing it. It’s about launching or doing it anyway when fear trips you up. For me, I have said this before, if you’ve heard it before, then you’ll know but if you’re new to me, you won’t and this is why I’m sharing that.
To me, our journey as a spiritual business entrepreneur, as a soul-driven, heart-based entrepreneur, our personal growth is very connected to the growth of the business. Our businesses are gateways. It’s portals. It’s openings for us to dissolve fear and expand in love to rid ourselves of limiting beliefs, self-sabotage, procrastination, whatever it is that’s been holding us back.
I believe that that will come up as you do your work. As you follow the calling that is within your heart, you will be faced with challenges and obstacles and situations and issues that you are going to have to move through.
There’s simply no way around them. One of those, to me, one of those gateways or doorways or portals is launching something “for the sake of” launching it, for the powerful, powerful lessons that are within them.
I have clients who very successfully launched their first ever thing and they fill their classes and workshops without hardly doing anything. They send out an e-mail and that’s it. And I have clients who the first time they do it, only 2 people show up and they want to run and hide.
Whether you are one or the other, it almost doesn’t matter. To me, it’s about the process that you go through. It’s through the experiences that you learn the knowledge that you gain so that you’re able to expand even further and further in love.
I will share three questions to ask yourself before postponing something. However, first I want to – the thing is, I almost don’t want to share what I’m about to share because I don’t want to take away your opportunity for your own revelations. I’ll try not to do that.
To me, the more soul-driven heart-based spiritual entrepreneurs that are showing up, that are doing what they’ve come to do, that are serving the world, supporting their clients, and that means you – not as a client but as that soul-driven, heart-based spiritual entrepreneur – the more of us that do that, the better our world becomes.
So that is my ultimate – the ultimate core of why I share what I share and why I have this podcast.
First Time I Launched a Program
Like I said, I’ve seen this both within myself. I’ve seen it come up in quite a few sessions over the summer and I’ve also seen it within my network of entrepreneurs. One of the biggest fears – and I know that this was one for me as well – was when the first time I ever launched a program.
That was 4 or 5 years ago. Only 2 people signed up and I remember being so – I don’t want to say frustrated. For me, my fear was “what will these people think?” They’ve signed up for this program. It was called “Heart and Soul Business Mastery” and if you’re one of those two people, you know who I’m talking about and I love you.
One of the golden pieces of that is those people, the two of them are still within my network and I see what they’re doing and it’s magnificent. That’s not what I wanted to talk about.
I remember my fear when I had those two people signed up – my fear was what will they think? I have promised them a group of people and instead I’m giving them just two. For me, I had to sit with that.
When I had hit the deadline, I had done the promotion (not in the way that I would do it today). But I’d done the promotion. I’d done the thing. Everything was the best that I could do at the time and I had those two people sign up.
I sat with it and I had to be open and honest with them because that was where I chose to come from. I’d given them the idea that it was going to be a group and yes, two people is a group but it’s also not as big a group as I wanted it. So my fear was what will they think?
However, I chose to be very open and honest with them. So I contacted each of them and said, “Listen, I just want you to know that there are going to be two people in this group and if that for you is a no-go, I am inviting you to step out and I’ll give you your money back. That’s not an issue. You can just not do it.”
Like I said, my fear was all of these things that they will think: I’m not worthy. They will think it’s not good enough. They will think that “only two people” and all of those – I can’t even remember them today but I had a million thoughts going on in my mind.
What happened when I contacted these two people, they were thrilled and over the moon. They were meeting me with a question, “Do you mean that we get to have you all by ourselves” throughout those – I think it was 6 or 12 weeks. I don’t remember.
Fears Turned To Gratefulness
I was struck by this realization that my fears, they were all put to shame because they were just incredibly grateful that I was still doing it, that I would show up and I did for them as I would have had there been 10 or 20 people in that group.
I delivered the same kind of content, the same level of quality, all of that, whether or not there were 2 people or there had been 20 people. To me, that was my first realization that maybe what I think is not necessarily what everyone else would think.
So I did have self-doubt. I did procrastinate. I did have perfectionism. I did want to cancel, all of that. But one of my big, big, big inspirations in terms of how we choose to show up – and this is what I say to my clients whether they have 2 people or 20 people or 200 people signed up for their first –
Because the level of “disappointment” actually expands when you grow so you may be at a place where for you 2 people is like you would’ve canceled straight away but for you, maybe 200 people is not a lot of people.
So you can be in different places. Where it’s at for me, the 2 people were like that. But one of my – and this is an example that I share with my clients when this shows up in session is my biggest inspirations for this and how you choose to show up is Marianne Williamson.
Show Up, Inspiring Example – Marianne Williamson
Back in 2012/13, I was at that time had 3 months where I was living in the LA area. At that time, she was doing Monday night talks at the Saban Theater and every Monday I would drive the 2 ½ hours, go to see her because I was A Course in Miracles student, still am, think I’ll be that until the day I leave.
So I’d drive up to see her and listen to her speak at the Saban Theater. I think there was probably somewhere between 500 to 700 people who showed up every single Monday. Monday after Monday after Monday, she would draw these crowds and she still does and she does almost no matter where she goes in the world.
But in 2014, I was back in Denmark – ’14 or ’13, I was back in Denmark. Marianne was scheduled to speak in Europe. She was scheduled to speak in London and she was scheduled to speak I think it was Hamburg or Berlin, one of those cities in Germany.
For some reason, I chose to go to the one in Germany. I remember arriving. First of all, it was in an auditorium where I don’t think that it could fit more than about 100 people maximum in it. I don’t think that we were more than 20, maybe 30, 35 people in that room.
However, Marianne showed up and delivered in the exact same way that I had seen her deliver on stage in front of 700 or 800 people on a weekly basis and she did it the exact same way as she did with 30 or 35 people.
And that to me was such a deep inspiration for how we choose to show up. How we choose to show up in anything and all things should not be defined by the external appearances but by the calling that you carry within, by the heart that you have, by the message that is asking to be born, by the work that is asking to be born through you.
3 Questions to Ask Yourself before Postponing
That’s why I have these 3 questions that I’m going to give you in just a moment. However, I also want to make sure that – that’s why to me it’s so important that you follow through with the plans that you’ve set.
Don’t suppress anything. Don’t push. Don’t ignore. That’s not something I ever want you to do or ask you to do. What I am asking you to do is allow for your fears to rise so that you can dissolve them in love, to have that open, loving, kind, caring, compassionate view on yourself and your actions, who you are and what you do.
Today of course having also found energy work through the Energy Alignment Method (EAM), that’s a method that I highly recommend for dissolving fear as well. I didn’t have that at that time. Today I do and that makes it so much easier, truth be told.
There are many different methods and whichever way you choose to use, that’s the right one for you but I want you to allow for yourself to – like give yourself permission to receive those lessons, those informations, those golden nuggets that can then move you further, expand you further.
The first question is: Is this decision based in fear or is it based in love?
To give you an example, I had a client who was doing a workshop and she’d been promoting it and inviting people in. I can’t remember. I think it was about 5 or 6 people who had chosen to join which she felt disappointed by.
So I got a text from her and the funny thing was I didn’t get a text from her about her event. I got a text from her saying, “I’m not where I’m supposed to be. I would like to postpone our session tomorrow.”
Me being who I am, I was like, “Hmm, something’s going on here. I’m not sure what it is,” so I said, “Listen. If this is because of x, y, and z, ask yourself whether or not you choose to come into the session or not. If it is fear or is it love-based?”
She was like, “Oh, okay.” So she chose to come into the session and usually when you do that, those sessions end up being the most powerful, the most magnificent, and it was because she then chose to come into that space of openness, of willingness to look at her fears.
We moved through it and we made a plan and we moved forward in a way that – and it was one of the most expansive, powerful sessions for her that allowed for her to see the importance of doing it anyway when fear trips you up.
Another example of postponing it is I had another client who was going to run a workshop series and the date that she had chosen to start this, she had had 9 or 10, she had filled what her capacity was like on one e-mail.
However, what people were saying was that they couldn’t start on that date and were asking if they could start later. So she chose to postpone it I think by a week or 2 weeks, allowing for people to be able to join the workshop class.
So those are the two when you ask that question – is this decision based in fear or is it based in love? So if it’s based in fear, I want you to acknowledge that, look at the fears, and move through them to dissolve them in love.
Allow yourself to get the wisdom and the experience and the knowledge that will be extremely valuable for you moving forward with your next workshop, your next course, your next event, and that.
If it’s based in love because there is a legitimate request for this and it’s based in “we can’t make it on that date but we can make it on that date,” fine. You can go ahead and move your dates around or postpone it. Those are the two examples for whether or not this is based in fear or whether or not it’s based in love.
The second question to ask yourself before you postpone something, “Is this for the highest of all?” meaning will you miss an opportunity for growth, for expansion, for dissolving fear if you choose to postpone it?
Are there people who won’t hear your message if you choose to postpone it? Are you choosing to hide rather than show up, essentially? So that’s number two: Is this for the highest of all?
When you ask yourself that question, my sense is that you will have an idea. Your guides will know and you will allow yourself that space of is this for the highest of all? If you can answer that question and say, “Yes, it’s absolutely for the highest of all.”
Again, going back to those two examples, is this for the highest of all? Yes, it’s absolutely for the highest of all because more people can be in the class and they can get the information and the wisdom and the knowledge and the revelations and all the things that you’re going to be sharing with them or know it’s not for the highest of all because this is actually me being based in fear, hiding away, wanting to just hide under the covers. Then it’s not for the highest of all and you know what to do.
Then the third question is “Am I standing in my own way?” Whoa.
One of the ways that we can get in our own way is by either procrastinating or perfectionism or self-doubt.
All of those things are essentially based in fear so are you – when I say “standing in your own way” – are you allowing yourself to birth the wisdom, the knowledge, the gnosis that is to come through you or are you the one blocking it?
And when you come from a space of fear, that contracts. It clenches. It takes away the flow and when you’re in the space of love, you’re in the flow, in the fluidity, in the dance with the universe and yes, there can be fear as well.
However, that fear is not one that will tear you down. It’s one that excites you or exhilarates you because it’s an unknown territory and you can choose to dance with that from a space of love.
That is what I am going to share with you today. What I would love to hear from you is what has been your biggest “a-ha”, insight, or revelation through listening to this episode and I’m also wondering if you would share your experience of doing it anyway in the comments.
Because the more of us who can share our stories, the more of us who can share our experiences, the more we can empower others and the more we can uplift, the more we can expand the love and dissolve the fear.
The more we can give our energy to that energy and vibration and frequency of love, of expansion, of showing up, of service, of kindness, of caring, of compassion, the better it is. So share your biggest “a-ha”, revelation, or insight and your experience with doing it anyway when fear is trying to trip you up.
I love you. Take care.
xo, Maria Saraphina
Spiritual Business Coach & Energy Alignment Method® Mentor
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Thank you for this very timely message today. I am smack dab in the middle of offering a workshop to my local female business owners in the town and I haven’t received one person yet that wants to sign up. I have 2 days left till the offer expires. I have offered a smaller workshop working through money blocks before (to have been taught in English and I live in Sweden) and there was not one person that signed up then either. I chalked it up to it being December and no one had the money. I did not do much to market it except for post it on my social media channels. Now I am offering a proper full fledged 4 hour Branding with Archetypes workshop on Valentines’ Day and I am marketing it, doing videos, sharing the videos, discussing what the session will be about and what they can expect and I have still not received one person asking me any information about it. My AHA: You just helped me to understand that there is something much bigger happening for me and I will not own shame and embarrassment as that is a cop out. I will look this in the face and say how proud I am of myself for trying something new, doing something new, learning something new and it just wasn’t the time. That’s it and that’s all. Try again with something else, right? :). My dreams of being a successful business coach for female entrepreneurs has just begun. I have been a Life Coach for 2,5 years so this is a new venture. Patience. I am figuring it out. All in due time. Hugs from Sweden! Åsa
You’re so welcome Åsa! Glad it served you.
If this shift is what your heart is calling you to do, then follow the nudges and guidance you receive. Taking one step after the next. Sometimes (often) those nudges might not make sense initially, yet as you begin to unfold and expand your journey usually moments of deep clarity will appear and you’ll see how it all makes sense.
Sending you so much love on your ever expanding journey.